Conan Chop Chop is a funny roguelike, but it has a problem

You know, dear reader, that according to the Chronicles of Nemedia, between the years when they sailed as the oceans engulfed Atlantis and its glorious metropolis and the time of the ascension of the Sons of Aryas, there was a impenetrable, a king in which he was extended to the world what blue cloaks under the stars … and it was then that Conan, the Cimmerio, appeared with black hair and a beautiful look, sword at the hand, stone, killer, assassin, with melancholic giants and heavy giants, to put under his sandals the pleasant thrones of the Earth.

And under its new duck sons, courtesy of Mighty Kingdom and Funcom, respectively developer and distributor of a Conan Chop-Chop which, as its own name already suggests, intends to ring the laurels of the graveyard and its aliens through a much more disillusioned view of his adventures.

Monolithic followers of Robert E. Howard’s character stories can drive the woman to a title that, unlike her previous incarnations, features a sympathetic and colorful visual distinction, much less a comic book like Cyanide & Happiness. However, the sedation of the adventures, the conquest and seizure of Valeria, Bêlit and himself Conan was captured in a roguelike in which the action is, without a doubt, the main center of attention. For this, Conan Chop-Chop has no doubt to take full notes on one of the main – if not the most important – references of the genre: the first incarnation of The Binding Of Isaac. Local synergies between skills and items, fights in rooms that will close our entrance and that we tend to eliminate enemies to advance, a generous pool of objects to unlock and a delicate balance between risk and reward to explore each labyrinth. All of these features will resonate among those who have spent countless hours – except watching the time counter of, pongamos, Steam – sending unstoppable bites and testing the most varied item blocks.


A priori, and with these tips, Conan Chop Chop was in possession of a recipe that was almost the guarantee of a good result. Unrestricted, the introduction of factors such as the four-band cooperative and some precision in the design makes the formula close to how close we need to get to it on our own.

In the thread of this one, note that Conan Chop Chop is not a millimeter copy of its references and therefore introduces elements of its own cosecha. If we keep our eyes on the fight, the possibility of alternating melee and ranged attacks – arrows, vaya – or the introduction of shields means that, from the start of each race, we have a good pool of items to combine. .. already better, with all that it brings. And that’s consistent with our intentions to detain Thoth Amon – was it Kulan Gath? What is certain is that he is an indescribably adoring hechicero of September – we will collect, at length, materials to unlock weapons and accessories, amplifying the random selection that awaits us in the population and, thus, improving our capacities. So far the good part.

The downside is that in Conan Chop Chop nothing is free. Better the opposite. At the start of each run, we can reverse the golden shield with the one that starts the character to increase their armament and defensive abilities or approve cheap magic. But the thing did not stop there. If we complete any of the four main areas where the adventure will end, we will return to the initial population and we will find new and improved ones which, unfortunately, will have a considerable increase in price. As a result, we end up with a system that has rendered obsolete the loot obtained so far and which forces us, once again, to invest the money earned to have a guaranteed minimum to reach the upper level. This dynamic imposes an unfair monetary barrier Stake in progress, not to say that it is healthy to pay twice for the same sword, one with our best materials and the other with the gold of our buttons.


A feeling of injustice that comes closer because of the structure of the mazmorras. As we mentioned above, Conan Chop Chop develops its meetings on the other hand with other titles unsuited to the genre. If we tend to have a preview area for each mazmorra that we can explore freely and when we access the depths of it we will not have to go back, in the rest of its parameters we can find very familiar customers. The blocks that will try to apprehend us, the narrow pinchos that will break our step -and that of our enemies- or the destructive elements that may or may not hide surprises will be a constant that will brighten up certain encounters full of swords, blocks and swords. So far everything is correct. Now, well, if you progress through these enclaves, it is, at no time, a military pass, its difficulty is to face the climax of despair that awaits the final rulers of each mazmorra. Authentic damage sponges and machines to wipe our health from a feather, not only playing with these perks but additionally hailing the scene with the enemies themselves in the area to distract our attention from their bosses. attack, show some hit point surprises and generally give poor Conan a hard time.

In short, all these impressions in the design of Conan Chop Chop come from a very simple but poorly focused intention of very different articular elements between them. Few in number and widely scattered, they are roguelikes to set up a viable multiplayer, we do not already say including the possibility that there are four players involved. If it’s a system of upgrades – in which we’ve only dealt with objectives, but it’s an review of character abilities – it doesn’t contribute to some progression and the general feeling that the game torpedoes our progress by not perching on enough rejugability – which isn’t certain, as the core combat and synergies work really well – the result is a title that sits in a solid aesthetically pleasing and judable but which does not prevent the blow from dispersing your efforts. And balancing all the systems that bring a roguelike to life has never been easier. Nor will you be looking for the same Conan, a chemist who knows the best thing in life is to slap enemies, destroy them, and hear the lamentations of his wives. And pan for gold.



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